Pioneer re: Principia Math(e)matica

by brightonsauce

Hard Science, very technical, advanced readers only please, thank you.  Also, I can’t spell mathematics, or even sience twice.

My wife and I endured time away from our public duties.

Most necessary given circumstance: we are, in your language, ‘pioneers’ and spent a gruelling weekend chaperoned by the corporation’s engineer.  And today, finally as a couple we are proud to announce  mastery of the craft/art/science of vertical slumber.

In most basic form, a civilian – such as yourself – pictures a wife dancing here in our attic lounge: she wears a dressing gown[.]  Spectacles rest upon a hairy forehead [wisps, NOT your common stubble].  Meanwhile, ‘Love Me Do’ spins on our turntable Youtube [again, and AGAIN].  My decision is made:

‘Enough of your gyration, lady baby,’ I say, ‘bedtime,’ I say, clap three times.

I nudge [with an elbow,] her fluffy frame slips into the curtain.  I roll – twist the folds seven times, and buckle her – up for a night of sleep.

The prototype – marketed as a ‘Buckle Up.’

She swings, she squeals, cocoon or moth, the attachments to our timber beams are most secure.

Once the battery pack arrives I shall rotate her at hourly intervals.  Meanwhile and Across the window, my very own leather cockpit hangs, the scent is divine as aftershave.  Cocoon awaits limbs, torso: imagine naked man with appetite for rapid eye movement, or dreams in your layman’s terms.

As for copycat marketeers, and Dyson, Apple Corporation [not the Beatles]  I am looking at you here, we shall chase imposters litigiously through the courts.  Our ambition, in short, total annihilation of the bed as we know it; [in] my vision, a nation that sleeps in cupboards.

Thank you

Mat Genius